Tuesday, November 17, 2009
The transition to being parents has been an incredible experience! We truly are loving every minute of it. Well almost every minute J I can’t believe how much Hailey has changed in just four short weeks. She is such a good baby! She rarely fusses, and has created her own schedule (which I’m sure won’t be permanent, but I’m enjoying it nonetheless). She is more alert now, and has started smiling. Every smile is a heart melter! I’m proud to say that she smiles at me the most. Of course, Matt and I are in a competition to see who gets the most smiles per day. Matt and I are enamored with all her little noises and funny faces. If someone had a camera in our house watching us interact with her, we would probably look ridiculous. I surprise myself with all the goofy dances I do and sounds I make. It’s pretty embarrassing really! I’m pretty sure Gus (our dog) thinks I’ve lost it. Speaking of Gus, he absolutely loves Hailey. Every time a peep comes from her, he immediately runs to her side. He will poke his head over the side of her bassinet to look at her and make sure she is ok. He has done great being aware of her too. I wasn’t sure how he would do with a new baby, but so far so good!
I can see her adjusting to life on the outside! It’s amazing how fast she has adapted! She is completely used to getting her diaper changed, and getting dressed. She loves the bath (as long as the water is running over her). She has chosen which kind of pacifier she likes (MAMS…thanks Brooke for the recommendationJ). She focuses her eyes on faces and I can see her taking in the world around her constantly. She is still wearing newborn size clothes, but she isn’t swimming in them like when we brought her home. A few things are looking a little snug already. She sleeps GREAT! I really can’t complain. She usually will sleep about five hours and then wake to eat. After eating she falls right back asleep for another 3 and a half to four hours! I am getting more rest now than when I was pregnant. I’m hoping this keeps up!
Being a mom is THE BIGGEST joy I have ever experienced! There have been some frustrating times…like when my milk came in and I ballooned up to four sizes bigger in a day…or when I find myself covered in puke or poop in the middle of the night. All that is eclipsed by the love that I have for her. I still cannot believe that I am a mom and that I have a DAUGHTER. I spend my days imagining her getting bigger…going to school…growing up and getting married! It is crazy that this beautiful little person will one day be an adult…will one day make her own decisions and have her own relationship with God. I could cry just thinking about it. I’m doing well. Just trying to heal and rest as much as I can. I am still not working which is a blessing but makes me antsy all the same. I still haven’t figured out exactly what will happen when I return to work, but I am not too worried about it. Hailey has PLENTY of people that have offered to spend time with her if I need it.
Matt is back at work. I think I’m adjusting to trying to figure out how to handle it all on my own during the day. I have been so spoiled having him off work. Getting out the door for a daily outing takes quite the effort. Matt started at a new store and likes it so far. It’s in Del Paso Heights, so things are pretty interesting compared to Folsom. I have to say that Matt is THE BEST dad ever. The other day one of our friends told me that she has never seen a Dad so in love with his daughter. It is so true. The second he comes in the door from work he rushes to hold her. He is the biggest help. I am still recovering (SLOWLY) and I can’t be on my feet for too long. He makes sure that I am fed and rested as much as possible. I try not to wake him in the middle of the night, but if I need something he is MORE than willing to get up and get it. We are making a great team in raising this little one, and our marriage is such an incredible blessing from God.
This last Sunday was her dedication ceremony to the Lord. It was such a huge blessing to have our friends and family join us! Thank you so much to those of you that came! It was such an honor to hear the church commit to being an example and supporting us as parents. Hailey is so lucky to have such godly influences in her life. She was ADORABLE in her pink dress, huge bow, and tights. We can’t find any shoes that will fit her yet, so we found tights that have little ballet slippers on them. It’s so fun having a little girl!
Next week, Matt’s mom Diane is coming into town to meet little Hailey! We are so excited to see her and spend time with her over the holiday. I’m giddy thinking that Christmas will be here soon. There is something about this season that just gives me SO MUCH joy! Sometimes I look at Hailey and am in awe that our Lord came to earth as innocent and helpless as she is. MIRACULOUS! Below are some photos from the last 4 weeks!
Thanks for reading!
In the Hospital
Pea in the Pod!
Smiling at Auntie
Pastor Michael praying over Hailey
We Love You Reynolds
Mom I hate these bows
Saturday, November 7, 2009
She was due on October 11th. Toward the end of my pregnancy, me and everyone else seemed to be sure that she would not make it to her due date. My tummy looked SOOO ready! So many people would say, "Holy Moly she is SOOO LOW." or "That baby is coming ANY DAY!" Everyday I would wake up to countless facebook and text messages predicting that day as the day she would be born. And then she didn't come. I had set myself up to NOT BE disappointed if she didn't come early. Naturally, I felt done physically, but mentally I was doing pretty well. However, all that changed on October 12th, the day after my due date! It changed even more on Tuesday the 13th when the doctor told me I was only
I have to say that I PRAYED everyday that I would not have to be induced. My plan was to go unmedicated as long as possible. I was told that I may not be able to have an epidural because of some platelet issues. I was preparing for the worst and the thought of pitocin and no epidural didn't sit so well with me! On the Thursday before I went into labor on my own (PRAISE GOD), I started having some pretty heavy bleeding. I called the advice nurse and she said to just keep an eye on it. When you are pregnant for the first time and have no idea what to expect, your first reaction is "Keep an eye on WHAT?!" On Saturday I was still bleeding quite a bit. Not enough to compare to a period, but more than spotting. I had always heard that when you have "bloody show" that labor is not far off. It had been days of bleeding and not even a cramp. I called Labor and Delivery again that night, and they said that I should come in to just make sure everything was ok. I was pretty frustrated because I knew I was not in labor. I had made up my mind that I would not be one of those women that is in and out of the hospital 40 times before they ACTUALLY go into labor. I threw on some slippers and didn't bring anything that I had packed. After Matt and I enjoyed Kaiser's cable, the prognosis was that I should go home. That night I was still
Sunday was another hard day. I went to church and endured the countless comments about how everyone could not believe that I was still pregnant. Everyone was so sweet, but I was a huge grumpy overdue hippo! I remember worshipping that Sunday and asking God to try and keep me focused on Him...I was so distracted. Not to mention the back pain from the hard squeaky pews. After church I retreated home back to my couch to sit it out. I had heard a lot of things about how to induce labor...eat spicy food! (check), walk a
Monday morning, I woke up out of my sleep at with a pretty strong contraction! 7 minutes later, another...and another and another. By , I woke Matt up and told him that he should probably let his work know that he was starting leave! I hopped in the shower to get ready for the day. Contractions were hard, but as long as I breathed they were VERY doable! Matt was so great timing them for me! He had a little piece of paper where he listed the times, and he would always yell out how far apart the one before had taken place. By , they were about 6 minutes apart and getting longer and stronger. We decided to go grab a bite to eat at Chilis to pass the time. In the birth class that we took, the midwife was telling us that being up and moving during early labor is the best way to get things progressing. Because of the epidural issue, I wanted to stay at home as long as possible. I had told my doctor this and she told me that I should come to the hospital when my contractions were 3 minutes apart. After eating, Matt and I went to Target. Thinking back on this is pretty comical. Every 4 minutes we would have to stop so I could breathe. I'm sure the people in Target were wondering what the heck was going on! We walked through almost every aisle there. Matt did a pretty good at cracking me up during this time...which actually made my pain worse. We were both so excited. I remember we bought something but I can't remember what. By the time we left my contractions were about every 3 to 4 minutes and hurting pretty bad! At this point we decided that we should run home and get things in the car to go to the hospital.
I was nervous about making the decision to go the hospital. I don't think I could have handled them telling me to leave and go home and wait it out, or to sit in triage waiting for my body to progress until they thought I was ready to be admitted. I had been having contractions ALL DAY LONG! We arrived at the hospital around . Once they hooked me up to the monitor, you could definitely see my contractions rise and fall. At this point, there was no talking through them. I would just have to breathe. Even though they hurt, I was surprised how easy it was to get through them. The doctor came in and checked me and I was
That first contraction after my water broke was a WHOLE DIFFERENT BALL GAME! My contractions became VERY strong and VERY long. They were only 2 minutes apart at most. I remember thinking that if I could just get in a different position it would feel a little better, but there wasn't enough time between them to even get there! It was a little stressful at this point...I never felt ready for the next contraction because I didn't have time to prepare! This is when my labor team came to my rescue. My amazing friend Kristin would massage my lower back, while my friend Mallory held my arms and talked me through them. My mom would massage my feet and help me breathe! Corinne decided to stay in town so she was there too! She held Mallory's baby and just her presence was a life saver (yes we had a FULL room). Everyone had a role and they were all great at it. For three hours I breathed through these contractions and tried to focus. I was getting really tired and started thinking that I wasn't sure how much longer I was going to be able to get through it. The whole time God kept my mind steady. I knew exactly what I wanted. I had decided that if I was close to pushing time, I would opt for a small does of morphine or something like that to take the edge off. If I was still far off, I wanted an epidural if I could have one. The nurse came in to check me around . At this point, I was in a lot of pain. My contractions were out of control close together and hard! I can't remember what Matt was doing but I'm pretty sure he was SLEEPING! ha The nurse checked me through a contraction which was the worst pain of the whole experience. She said "You're about the same," to which I immediately said, "I would like an epidural." I love my labor team for supporting me! No one ever asked if I was sure, and no one ever suggested it before I decided to get one. I was not disappointed. My platelets were fine and the doctor said it would be about 20 minutes before they arrived, to which I said, "Can we make it sooner?" Around the anesthesiologist came in. She was a little rude I have to admit. She made some people leave the room, and she told me that I waited too long. But I loved her all the same! Getting the epidural was really hard. Trying to hold still through those contractions seemed to be impossible. It took a really long time and a lot of contractions before it was in place. Around the epidural was in place, and by 9:3o I was feeling relief! It was the MOST glorious feeling ever! I remember thinking, "Ok, I'm only
Pushing was very easy compared the pain of transition labor. The pressure was uncomfortable, but again, very doable. I could feel each contraction come even though I had the epidural. The midwife that delivered was absolutely amazing! I can still hear her voice in my head...so calming! After a little less than an hour of pushing, Hailey Grace came into the world! All glorious
The next part was probably the worst part of all. They began to stitch what they thought was only a few mild tears. However, once the midwife started stitching, she quickly realized that they needed a doctor to come in and finish. Once the doctor took a look at me, she immediately ordered the nurse to have my epidural turned on full blast. I have NEVER felt so numb in my life. I couldn't even hold my own body up above the waist! Such a weird feeling, but I'm sure better than the alternative. The doctor than began to put me back together. After THREE HOURS and 150 stitches, she was finally done. I remember feeling so bad for my dad who was standing out in the hall all that time just waiting to come in! It seemed like forever. The doctor said that since my blood platelets were low it made my tissue very soft in the birth canal. As Hailey came down, things just began to tear one right after the other. I can tell you that if I ever write a book about pregnancy or motherhood, it will be about postpartum recovery! Maybe call it The Last Six Weeks (and beyond.......) I was prepared for labor and delivery, but not for recovery! While I can tell that I am getting better every day, it is still pretty painful. I am so antsy just sitting around doing nothing. I try and do a small outing everyday, but after about 5 minutes of walking, I'm quickly over it!
A lot of people have asked me why they didn't just take her out via C Section because the process was so long...to that I say I THANK GOD that I didn't have a C Section. Labor is hard, don't get me wrong, and there probably isn't anything that can really prepare you for the pain...However, I am not lying when I say I am truly blessed to have the experience that I did. I know that there were a lot of you praying for me through the end of the never ending pregnancy, and I can't tell you just how thankful I am for you all! Since that day, there have been a few hard ones trying to figure out motherhood, but it's the most precious gift God has ever given to me. That He would entrust little Hailey to us as her parents is the highest honor. Matt says all the time that he understands God's love for us so much better. To give up His only son...when you have your own child that sacrifice is made much more real.
Thanks for reading this long one!